RantînoFly

Me

I've had an average life.

But what is average anyway.
Most people I talk to are so different, and the norms
they take for granted are so strange and even
antagonistic to my own.

Well, I was born in the country, way in the country,
on a farm even
but that was cool, I had some friends, a few were human, the rest
chickens, cats and sheep. I had the special
areas of the yard that kids pretend are whatever
I can't remember too much
since I moved away when I was 5, I didn't like it at first but
it was economocal, poltical, smart, whatever, and I
got used to it.

I moved to a suburb, into a nice little spec house
that looked like a few others in the neighborhood
Got a new school, which I was less than thrilled about.
But I got used to it
New house, new school, new people, most of them jerks,
I mean why can't they just behave once in a while?
I always listened to my parents, but no one else.
Of course this caused problems in school.
They told me to color

I didn't want to color something that
was already there
I wanted to create
Why should some stranger suddenly tell me
what to do
to bad for them
And then they thought I was retarded b/c I
didn't follow the rules
I almost stayed back
and almost got reviewed by special ed
funny looking at it now

This went along for a few years, then improved a little
in second
then a lot more in third
Finally someone just gave me a book and let me work on my own
got much farther than the pace of all the
"I don't get it" er's
Things were fine through 5th grade

Then I got moved to another school
Another long term decision thingy
be better for my future
while I don't know that being seperated
from everyone I knew and put into
a strange place was 'better'
I had to trust
The people there were idiots
All rich snob that wouldn't give me the time of day
I wasn't the child of a
doctor father and
house-wife mother
So those years I tried to forget,
finally getting through them.

Moved again
But i had to,
elementary school was gone,
High school came
At first it wasn't cool
people were strange and I was still
under the impression that everyone hated me
I was wrong but didn't realize it
I regret not trying but I can't change that now
There were a few variables, having to do with
sucking up to a carpool person to get rides
and some punks in the class
but I messed up

Things do get better,
much better
The punks leave, I got rid of the carpool
well that one
and the class went on one of those
overnight retreat things
catholic school BTW
and no I'm not a prep
that enabled me to know the class better
all 19 of them
either that or the 40 hours of no sleep
help me to act without being self conscious
I found that works

Then things change again
I leave HS a year early
enter college
with people less mature than
my HS
no doubt
that year goes by fast
I get back once in a while to do stuff
not as much as I'd like too
but enough

What will the future be like?

Will it be here?

Here?

Or here?

I'm not sure, maybe all, maybe one, maybe two.
I'll have to wait.

--Dann

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